Except for Good Ol' Marty ... i'm pretty happy with all my other predictions...hey i was almost doing a roger ebert ...i called em all ... Charlie Kaufman, Sideways, the tech awards.. except for my three flaws... for animated feature Shrek2, best picture aviator... i was almost sure marty would win...
but damn... You lose The covetted title for Raging Bull, You lose again for Last Temptation of Christ, You lose yet again for GoodFellas, yet once more fate has it that you lose for Gangs of New York ... He lost to Robert Redford(Oridnary People), he lost to Kevin Costner(Dances with Wolves), he lost to Barry Levinson(Rain Man)...he lost to Roman Polanski(The Pianist..) Will he be another Alfred Hitchcock... a great director ... but never celebrated by the academy... always the bridesmaid ..but never the bride..??
Chris Rock was as convincing as Shit on Toast... boo!!! he was being politically correct not turning it into the Chris Rock show.. but expect more... thank god the cool dude from electric company finally won... it was good to see morgan freeman win!
Monday, February 28, 2005
Bienvenue a la Tour CN
Bienvenue a la Tour CN
Regardez ici pour l'information en francais
Dont ask me how i got it ... but as far as sumbody i asked as to how i sound said ..it looked like i knew what i was saying... Far from the truth of the matter of course.. i don't know jack shit in french ..and i had to end my freaking presentation with these lines...
Any way as for the interview ... Saturday morning ... i'm like do i want to go for this freaking interview .. is it worth my time ..will i get hired ... why the hell dont i get back to bed and get some much deserved 40 winks... uhuh!!! 5:00 and i was up and hovering around.. shit shave shower... and my i wasnt still sure if i wanted to go... i asked myself for some kind of a sign... and u'd think something would happen.. but nothing nade zilch.. maybe that was the sign... i headed out the door ... got my arse off the first bus ...boarded the Toronto Express ... and got off at Union Station ... and once i get there ... i have this whole mental sparring that i'm doing... buzz like a butterfly sting like a bee..thing... that's what's going on in my head... but i'm cool... like i dont give a flying fuck... this job meant nothing to me... that was the inner mantra.. and i reach there ahead of time .. chat up with this chick outside ..was a particularly chilly day to begin with ... (-15C the wind chill kinda brought it down to -22C) ... and there we're chatting up afront of a closed up CN tower.. we get inside ... my scheduled time is 9:30am.. it's almost 9:00am and she has her interview at 9 so heads for the secruity clearance.. i had down to the gift shop place thingy.. browse around once more ..chat up with the sales staff.. the chicks.. are dont worry... it'll be easy ... Andy's a nice guy .. he's supposed tobe the guy who's doing my interview.. and i ask what's the hottest selling item.. and u know throw a lil party in my head....walk up the stairs ... get to the security chk ... and meet up with the elevator chick ... who once again chats up with me how to answer target specific questions ..any way i get to the 360 restraunt.. [a dinner for two here wuld most likely cost a min of $360.00 ... but i'd be willing to shell that kinda cash ... maybe if i were going to propose to a special somebody maybe... but as of now that'll be what i make a whole week working here..] Andy comes up to meet me ... we get to our table to start off with the interview ...
{remember sachin from the world cup match finals against australia.. that's me usually in a technical interview...totally fucked up... but this was me .. taking stance...and it felt like the india-pak match...} it could quite possibly have been the magnificent view..
his first question ... What interests u to work at the CN Tower? i respond.. The Cn .. is after all one big antenna, i'm an Electronics & Telecom Guy ...hey if i could work here in the tech side of things that would be living the dream..as of now ..this gives me bragging rights... {there... i had just smashed my first six...and i hadnt even got started.. }
The inner engines were just revving up.. and i was slick as shit .. cool as a cucumber... i was tanya harding on ice.....he goes on to how would u show ur paying attention to what some one is saying ... i respond with a if you've ever had a girl friend u know exactly how to show ur paying attn to what the other person is saying ... and there.. he was laughing at that ..and he said funny someone else had said the same thing too.. {ok ... humm looks like he things i'm so full of shit my skin is brown.. looks like i have to change gears...}
he asks how would u rate customer satisfaction... and some shit like that ... bam... this is where i exploded... emotional impact of tourism shopping... how u want to take a slice of the action along with u syndrome.. i was fluid ...i almost started a a whole woody allen meets charlie kauffman thing there... it was just great... and the best part was i was digging in to the trench ..and i was calling the shots ... i was loving it ..u can see the powershift.. and i was ho-humming my way thru..
he asked me how i engage myself while doing boring mundane activities... so i told him abt the panel wiring .. 6ft by 3ft long wiring... half a kilometer of cables and wires.. looking up blue brints troubleshooting these babies are what they make corrupt engineers do in hell...for an eternity.. and i do this 8-10 hours everyday.. humm so i told him the honest to god truth.. i use the reservoir dog technic... i call wires by their names... Mr Pink Mr White.. then i do have a cluedo option once in a while .. where Miss Scarlett shorted Mr Cobalt in the Transformer .......it does look like i'm a loony to any one else working around me... but me i'm content in the magical world of wires i create.............he liked that too.......
and there u had it .. he said he was discussing the contract with me.. and said all he was worried abt was my commuting between hamilton and toronto...and i said look this could be my opening to a job here in the tech side of things i'm willing to take the gamble... His eyes lit up and face cheered like he got the best blow job in his life .. he said that was sheer brilliance and very few ppl put two and two together ... and that was a spectacular amount of foresight on my part... well every thing said and done ... i headed outta andy's interview to the panel interview... which is where i had to enact a role play... then there was the product endorsements .. and then finally the french lines... ... well by the looks of it i start next Saturday...
Regardez ici pour l'information en francais
Dont ask me how i got it ... but as far as sumbody i asked as to how i sound said ..it looked like i knew what i was saying... Far from the truth of the matter of course.. i don't know jack shit in french ..and i had to end my freaking presentation with these lines...
Any way as for the interview ... Saturday morning ... i'm like do i want to go for this freaking interview .. is it worth my time ..will i get hired ... why the hell dont i get back to bed and get some much deserved 40 winks... uhuh!!! 5:00 and i was up and hovering around.. shit shave shower... and my i wasnt still sure if i wanted to go... i asked myself for some kind of a sign... and u'd think something would happen.. but nothing nade zilch.. maybe that was the sign... i headed out the door ... got my arse off the first bus ...boarded the Toronto Express ... and got off at Union Station ... and once i get there ... i have this whole mental sparring that i'm doing... buzz like a butterfly sting like a bee..thing... that's what's going on in my head... but i'm cool... like i dont give a flying fuck... this job meant nothing to me... that was the inner mantra.. and i reach there ahead of time .. chat up with this chick outside ..was a particularly chilly day to begin with ... (-15C the wind chill kinda brought it down to -22C) ... and there we're chatting up afront of a closed up CN tower.. we get inside ... my scheduled time is 9:30am.. it's almost 9:00am and she has her interview at 9 so heads for the secruity clearance.. i had down to the gift shop place thingy.. browse around once more ..chat up with the sales staff.. the chicks.. are dont worry... it'll be easy ... Andy's a nice guy .. he's supposed tobe the guy who's doing my interview.. and i ask what's the hottest selling item.. and u know throw a lil party in my head....walk up the stairs ... get to the security chk ... and meet up with the elevator chick ... who once again chats up with me how to answer target specific questions ..any way i get to the 360 restraunt.. [a dinner for two here wuld most likely cost a min of $360.00 ... but i'd be willing to shell that kinda cash ... maybe if i were going to propose to a special somebody maybe... but as of now that'll be what i make a whole week working here..] Andy comes up to meet me ... we get to our table to start off with the interview ...
{remember sachin from the world cup match finals against australia.. that's me usually in a technical interview...totally fucked up... but this was me .. taking stance...and it felt like the india-pak match...} it could quite possibly have been the magnificent view..
his first question ... What interests u to work at the CN Tower? i respond.. The Cn .. is after all one big antenna, i'm an Electronics & Telecom Guy ...hey if i could work here in the tech side of things that would be living the dream..as of now ..this gives me bragging rights... {there... i had just smashed my first six...and i hadnt even got started.. }
The inner engines were just revving up.. and i was slick as shit .. cool as a cucumber... i was tanya harding on ice.....he goes on to how would u show ur paying attention to what some one is saying ... i respond with a if you've ever had a girl friend u know exactly how to show ur paying attn to what the other person is saying ... and there.. he was laughing at that ..and he said funny someone else had said the same thing too.. {ok ... humm looks like he things i'm so full of shit my skin is brown.. looks like i have to change gears...}
he asks how would u rate customer satisfaction... and some shit like that ... bam... this is where i exploded... emotional impact of tourism shopping... how u want to take a slice of the action along with u syndrome.. i was fluid ...i almost started a a whole woody allen meets charlie kauffman thing there... it was just great... and the best part was i was digging in to the trench ..and i was calling the shots ... i was loving it ..u can see the powershift.. and i was ho-humming my way thru..
he asked me how i engage myself while doing boring mundane activities... so i told him abt the panel wiring .. 6ft by 3ft long wiring... half a kilometer of cables and wires.. looking up blue brints troubleshooting these babies are what they make corrupt engineers do in hell...for an eternity.. and i do this 8-10 hours everyday.. humm so i told him the honest to god truth.. i use the reservoir dog technic... i call wires by their names... Mr Pink Mr White.. then i do have a cluedo option once in a while .. where Miss Scarlett shorted Mr Cobalt in the Transformer .......it does look like i'm a loony to any one else working around me... but me i'm content in the magical world of wires i create.............he liked that too.......
and there u had it .. he said he was discussing the contract with me.. and said all he was worried abt was my commuting between hamilton and toronto...and i said look this could be my opening to a job here in the tech side of things i'm willing to take the gamble... His eyes lit up and face cheered like he got the best blow job in his life .. he said that was sheer brilliance and very few ppl put two and two together ... and that was a spectacular amount of foresight on my part... well every thing said and done ... i headed outta andy's interview to the panel interview... which is where i had to enact a role play... then there was the product endorsements .. and then finally the french lines... ... well by the looks of it i start next Saturday...
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Hey Man!
Meandering thru the miscellanous today actually.. coz am in a bit of hurry ... humm ... but none the less ... something that i noticed the other day... "Hey Man!!!" the colloquial slang... rather intriguing to look into where it came from .. and how it originated ... the black slaves were called "Ey Boy !" by their masters... no matter even when the black men turned into decript seniles ..were still referred to as 'boy!' as an act of rebellion .. blacks addressed themselves hey man!! and there lies the origins of the term...
The Silver Dollar Conspiracy... sum thing else i was reading about... "http://www.heretical.com/miscellx/usury.html" .. working my ass off all week... u expect to see something in return for all that work ...that's when i read this article... it just made so much sense...
A lot more to blog abt ... right now ... aint the time ... Happy Birthday Amma!!
The Silver Dollar Conspiracy... sum thing else i was reading about... "http://www.heretical.com/miscellx/usury.html" .. working my ass off all week... u expect to see something in return for all that work ...that's when i read this article... it just made so much sense...
A lot more to blog abt ... right now ... aint the time ... Happy Birthday Amma!!
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Where Have All The Beautiful People Gone???
Look out at any metropolitian city bustling with ppl... This is when u have to go downtown.. the bus terminal .. the train station... the heart of the city ...where you have sea of ppl swaddling there way thru in the course of the day... go there at 5:00am... if ur headed out for shift work... this is when u are most likely to notice this phenomenon... u find none of those pretty girls who inhabit the streets in the brightest of outfits ...swaying left and right those pubescent hips in a way only young girls can... thru the streets distracting any mortal male ...They dont live here....they dont exist on the planet... those cute lil kids with water bottles and bags holding mommies hands as the cross the roads in herds ... all dressed alike like they all fell out of some giant candy jar.... they have been sucked outta the planet too... you dont see dazzling young men weilding their immaculate gadgets and brief cases and shades thru which they give those stares to those afore mentioned pretty lil things ... they dont seem to exist either... then who does live on this planet ... if it were to be visited by an alien life form at 5:00 am....well the welcoming coming committee..is a paltry bunch of old men with tired faces... running to get to their jobs to feed their loved ones... no there isnt much enthusiasm on their faces .. it isnt cheery or full of joy and grace... as are those of the other hours of the day.. these men men have faces cast in stone... and spirits that have faded and withered away... they are the ones that make the welcoming committee... no wonder those aliens keep turning back... for as they see it ...there isnt much life on the planet ... most ppl are asleep ..and the ones awake..seem to keep repeating the same things over and over again... they jump off one mode of transport to another ..and then they keep doing some mundane task till they get exhausted and return back to their domicile to sleep and the cycle continues... are u sure this is a sign of intellegent life asks one alien to the other... how different are they from the ants in our ant hill back home? ... what would those aliens know about life on earth, families in far away places, friends we cherish to be with, consuming fluids that play with our emotions...things we do to feel happy, how signals captured through wireless devices make us laugh and cry ... what would those aliens know about money and loans and debts and credits and ursuries... what would those aliens know about death and loss and pain ... what would they know .... about hose faces cast in stone ..those tired old men dragging their feet thru the wee hours of the morning... what do they know about how he makes sure the beautiful people inhabit the better part of the day...
Sunday, February 20, 2005
The Canadian International AutoShow
Ah yes the CIAS ... not only is it North America's largest car expo... Larger than Detroit (humm which is where all the good shit end up going... ) 850,000 sq ft...that's quite a bit of area to cover walking to see the 42 car exhibitors... welll chk out www.autoshow.ca for details... as for me ..lemme say i needed the day off to feel good abt myself... and this surely was a great way to do it ... it was rather chilly thru the latter part of the day ..but nonetheless a terrific experience.. now what did i oggle over... hummm ... i got to sit in the new Mustangs ... the new Mercedes S, E, C Class... the smart Car... well we dont wanna take time out to talk abt all the hondas and toyotas and fords and pontiacs i sat now do we... I got my customized version of the dodge magnum commercial made... u can chk it out on
http://tdw.thindataworks.com/clients/DaimlerChrysler/evideo/videos/t1969.wmv
The cars to oggle over were the lamborginis ..they had 3 of em .. the ferraris ..they had 4 of em... they had 2 aston martins... 2 bentleys ....the classic car section was beautiful .....the bikes were great too... the ducatis..the harleys...
well as for cars to watch out for ..... lemme give u my two cents abt concept cars... looks like every designer out there goes to the same design school ...or uses the same software to design the cars ... coz goddamit.. they all look the same sans the minor differences like perhaps a logo maybe... sheesh... the lincoln aviator concept model and the lexus concept car looked like they were fraternal twins... not that they werent breath taking... but u want a lil variety ... it's like u walk into a jap restraunt expecting a kimono clad yellow female with a funny accent asking u if u want to try sushi... and u walk into a southern ranch expecting a blonde in flannels trying to coax u into getting honey garlic ribs ...
i think toyota's going to be serious competition with their FX cruiser for the Hummer H3... both of em looking pretty much the same .. the H3 is a poor man's hummer..no it's the danny de vito/joe pesci of hummers.... u wanna laugh at it ... then u think it might turn around and say something like "u think i'm funny"....
it was a good experience ... had my arse enjoy the comfort of the leather interiors of BMWs, Mercedes, Lexus, Audis, Jaguars, u name it ..my arse was loving it .. my nose couldnt stop thanking me ..each time i gorged in the new car smell ... lousy part was from ten thirty in the morning to 5 thrity in the evening as i straddled around from car to car ...i tried honking every one of those cars to find each and every one of em was disengaged... not even one that wasnt...
Like every Papillion.. has a Dustin Hoffman that out does the Steve McQueen ... my Dustin Hoffman was the CN Tower.. I get to Toronto a wee bit early.. i was expecting a huge line up for the tickets ... but i had acquired one with adequate ease ..and had loads of time to spare... so as i walk past the "Caution: Falling Ice at the Convention Centre" (sidetrack... have u thought what a freaking icicle from that height could do to u ... holy fuck... i didnt realize that until i was there...).. find a cpl of guys walking around as aim lessly as i was... they ask me are u here for the job fair... so i said yeah.... it starts a 9 so i hear.. and hey it was 8:30... i could kill some time.. and i thought there mught be some companys having their stalls setup and i walk around grab a pen or two and get the hell out there... lil did i know in the next 20 minutes there were close to 45 ppl there with resumes et al... humm ... nine comes rolling by ... i hop jump and skip in to the CN tower... and there's a questionnaire to fill out... after the elaborate screening of course... and then i see what's happening...they seem to be having a job fair for the positions at the CN tower... COOL!!! along comes a chick who gives us the ... hi there everybody ..thanks for coming to the job fair.. as a token of appreciation u get a complimentary pass to go thru the CN tower .. all day today... (now that's a sweet deal... it's like $35 something otherwise... ) so i see the questionnarie usual..facts and figures stuff.. and then i look at who they are hiring .. its for the 360 restraunt... didnt interest me... then there was a retail sales associate position... thought hey..yeah might as well... filled in my sheet... they ask me to proceed to the 360 restraunt for the interview... i mean ... WOW!! hey if u ever have a job interview... this one is the icing on the cake... on top of the CN tower.. it doesnt get better than this... so i have this guy call me over... we start our lil conversation ... and did i have this guy wrapped around me...i'm getting good at the fine art of bullshitting i must say..coz by the end of it .. the guy wasnt just impressed..but he couldnt hide it ...his poker face decimated... and i asked him off the record what were the odds... he said there were 15 positions.. 20 candidates yesterday.. but i was by far the best candidate he had interviewed...asked me to partake on some breakfast served in the lounge as my interview scores are tallied up ... and i wait hit on this cute chick sitting next to me ...nonchalantly talking to her abt the job description... [she actually wanted the job.. wasnt a con like me.]... Any way they call me in after a while... i have to go next saturday for an interview with the sales manager of the CN tower.. there's a speech and stuff i have to prepare it seems... i'm going do it just for shits and giggles...
http://tdw.thindataworks.com/clients/DaimlerChrysler/evideo/videos/t1969.wmv
The cars to oggle over were the lamborginis ..they had 3 of em .. the ferraris ..they had 4 of em... they had 2 aston martins... 2 bentleys ....the classic car section was beautiful .....the bikes were great too... the ducatis..the harleys...
well as for cars to watch out for ..... lemme give u my two cents abt concept cars... looks like every designer out there goes to the same design school ...or uses the same software to design the cars ... coz goddamit.. they all look the same sans the minor differences like perhaps a logo maybe... sheesh... the lincoln aviator concept model and the lexus concept car looked like they were fraternal twins... not that they werent breath taking... but u want a lil variety ... it's like u walk into a jap restraunt expecting a kimono clad yellow female with a funny accent asking u if u want to try sushi... and u walk into a southern ranch expecting a blonde in flannels trying to coax u into getting honey garlic ribs ...
i think toyota's going to be serious competition with their FX cruiser for the Hummer H3... both of em looking pretty much the same .. the H3 is a poor man's hummer..no it's the danny de vito/joe pesci of hummers.... u wanna laugh at it ... then u think it might turn around and say something like "u think i'm funny"....
it was a good experience ... had my arse enjoy the comfort of the leather interiors of BMWs, Mercedes, Lexus, Audis, Jaguars, u name it ..my arse was loving it .. my nose couldnt stop thanking me ..each time i gorged in the new car smell ... lousy part was from ten thirty in the morning to 5 thrity in the evening as i straddled around from car to car ...i tried honking every one of those cars to find each and every one of em was disengaged... not even one that wasnt...
Like every Papillion.. has a Dustin Hoffman that out does the Steve McQueen ... my Dustin Hoffman was the CN Tower.. I get to Toronto a wee bit early.. i was expecting a huge line up for the tickets ... but i had acquired one with adequate ease ..and had loads of time to spare... so as i walk past the "Caution: Falling Ice at the Convention Centre" (sidetrack... have u thought what a freaking icicle from that height could do to u ... holy fuck... i didnt realize that until i was there...).. find a cpl of guys walking around as aim lessly as i was... they ask me are u here for the job fair... so i said yeah.... it starts a 9 so i hear.. and hey it was 8:30... i could kill some time.. and i thought there mught be some companys having their stalls setup and i walk around grab a pen or two and get the hell out there... lil did i know in the next 20 minutes there were close to 45 ppl there with resumes et al... humm ... nine comes rolling by ... i hop jump and skip in to the CN tower... and there's a questionnaire to fill out... after the elaborate screening of course... and then i see what's happening...they seem to be having a job fair for the positions at the CN tower... COOL!!! along comes a chick who gives us the ... hi there everybody ..thanks for coming to the job fair.. as a token of appreciation u get a complimentary pass to go thru the CN tower .. all day today... (now that's a sweet deal... it's like $35 something otherwise... ) so i see the questionnarie usual..facts and figures stuff.. and then i look at who they are hiring .. its for the 360 restraunt... didnt interest me... then there was a retail sales associate position... thought hey..yeah might as well... filled in my sheet... they ask me to proceed to the 360 restraunt for the interview... i mean ... WOW!! hey if u ever have a job interview... this one is the icing on the cake... on top of the CN tower.. it doesnt get better than this... so i have this guy call me over... we start our lil conversation ... and did i have this guy wrapped around me...i'm getting good at the fine art of bullshitting i must say..coz by the end of it .. the guy wasnt just impressed..but he couldnt hide it ...his poker face decimated... and i asked him off the record what were the odds... he said there were 15 positions.. 20 candidates yesterday.. but i was by far the best candidate he had interviewed...asked me to partake on some breakfast served in the lounge as my interview scores are tallied up ... and i wait hit on this cute chick sitting next to me ...nonchalantly talking to her abt the job description... [she actually wanted the job.. wasnt a con like me.]... Any way they call me in after a while... i have to go next saturday for an interview with the sales manager of the CN tower.. there's a speech and stuff i have to prepare it seems... i'm going do it just for shits and giggles...
Friday, February 18, 2005
Happy Together
"If I should call you up, invest a dime
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine
So happy together"
The turtles sang that... "Adaptation" the movie ends with it playing in the credit roll... hummm .... there's a reason i mention the Nicholas Coppolla movie... for there was a time ... when i felt my life would decimate into one of those endings "Leaving Las Vegas" i pictured myself like that... alone.. washed out... a freak .. where no human soul cares... and better yet even you dont bother...
But like Sting said .... "Those days are over!!!" Today, It's the '05 version Arun u have in front of u ... it's going to be a quarter of a century on the planet very soon... have learnt from a lot of bitter realities ... Have been king of the world and scum of the universe ... have been traded in like a used car by some... fucked around like a crack whore by others ... but i have lived thru it all to tell the tales... But this year has been so freakishly different... my brain is being taken over ..i swear it ..it's like a fungus growing within and taking over the entire place...i clearly remember the 18 year old with all that anger... the 19 year old rebel without a cause... wow ... they seem like different ppl ... not that they aren't there any more .. but they dont control the place... this new guy is .. and u know what i'm beginning to like the new guy .. he doesn't push u around ... he's a 5 yr old at times... and it's all Strawberry Fields Forever..with him ... he takes a beating ...but is very Gandhian ... in the sense ..he'll cum back at u in the most ubsurd way... and take over... well enough abt the new guy ..if he's here to stay i'll introduce him later...
This is a formal thank you... to a cpl of ppl for helping me out with the week.....in ways u'd never know.... and my thank you to the new guy as well.....
in reverse order...
lemme say a big OMG!!! In the words of the Guverner of Hiroshima "WTF was that??!!!" to myself ... and a BIG 10q... to NG(Fri), ACJ(Wed), AJ(Tue), TD(Mon).... for calling me... It meant the world and more to me... you guys have no idea... what kinda days i was having... and how those cpl of minutes over the phone just brushed away all those worries and bothers and pains and pangs and stress of the day ... and u paste on that goofy smile ...and take all the shit coming at u ... just coz ..some one some where cared to remember ....lil ol' me ... and took time out for their schedules to talk to lil ol' me....... Awww..... isnt that the sweetest thing to happen ... I swear it is ............It just puts the zest back in life.. it just has given me the hope to put my trust back in ppl again ... hummm .... it's been a while ... and now that feels good... I THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART ... FOR IT MEANT THE WORLD TO ME AND MORE....
I'll elaborate on the feeling more ... and lemme take off my work boots and live a lil... hummm .... if all goes well... perhaps a movie .. and the Int'l Auto Expo at Toronto ... tommorow... more to follow on the expo after i've attended it...until then ..hang on tight..
And you say you belong to me and ease my mind
Imagine how the world could be, so very fine
So happy together"
The turtles sang that... "Adaptation" the movie ends with it playing in the credit roll... hummm .... there's a reason i mention the Nicholas Coppolla movie... for there was a time ... when i felt my life would decimate into one of those endings "Leaving Las Vegas" i pictured myself like that... alone.. washed out... a freak .. where no human soul cares... and better yet even you dont bother...
But like Sting said .... "Those days are over!!!" Today, It's the '05 version Arun u have in front of u ... it's going to be a quarter of a century on the planet very soon... have learnt from a lot of bitter realities ... Have been king of the world and scum of the universe ... have been traded in like a used car by some... fucked around like a crack whore by others ... but i have lived thru it all to tell the tales... But this year has been so freakishly different... my brain is being taken over ..i swear it ..it's like a fungus growing within and taking over the entire place...i clearly remember the 18 year old with all that anger... the 19 year old rebel without a cause... wow ... they seem like different ppl ... not that they aren't there any more .. but they dont control the place... this new guy is .. and u know what i'm beginning to like the new guy .. he doesn't push u around ... he's a 5 yr old at times... and it's all Strawberry Fields Forever..with him ... he takes a beating ...but is very Gandhian ... in the sense ..he'll cum back at u in the most ubsurd way... and take over... well enough abt the new guy ..if he's here to stay i'll introduce him later...
This is a formal thank you... to a cpl of ppl for helping me out with the week.....in ways u'd never know.... and my thank you to the new guy as well.....
in reverse order...
lemme say a big OMG!!! In the words of the Guverner of Hiroshima "WTF was that??!!!" to myself ... and a BIG 10q... to NG(Fri), ACJ(Wed), AJ(Tue), TD(Mon).... for calling me... It meant the world and more to me... you guys have no idea... what kinda days i was having... and how those cpl of minutes over the phone just brushed away all those worries and bothers and pains and pangs and stress of the day ... and u paste on that goofy smile ...and take all the shit coming at u ... just coz ..some one some where cared to remember ....lil ol' me ... and took time out for their schedules to talk to lil ol' me....... Awww..... isnt that the sweetest thing to happen ... I swear it is ............It just puts the zest back in life.. it just has given me the hope to put my trust back in ppl again ... hummm .... it's been a while ... and now that feels good... I THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART ... FOR IT MEANT THE WORLD TO ME AND MORE....
I'll elaborate on the feeling more ... and lemme take off my work boots and live a lil... hummm .... if all goes well... perhaps a movie .. and the Int'l Auto Expo at Toronto ... tommorow... more to follow on the expo after i've attended it...until then ..hang on tight..
Monday, February 14, 2005
Fat Bottomed Girls
Ladies and Gentlemen ... Lemme wish you all a very Happy Valentine's Day!!! Hope u've spread enough love and joy as can be begotten... well ...
how goes the world .... what makes the world go around ...
A> Fat Bottomed Girls...
B> Love...
for all u flaming fags out there who wish to empathize with Freddie Mercury... go ahead pick A.. as for the rest of us... yes "Love" does make the world fo round... love in all it's forms shapes colors and varieties... from u garden variety ...Kwik-E-Mart corner store love... to the more enduring Walmart love... to the designer boutique variety of love... in all it's merchandized forms ... love does make for the capitalist's bread and butter... as any Jewish Salesman would tell u abt love and sales... in the most Jerry Maguire-isque way possible "You Complete Me!!!" and us.. what abt us... well we ...we were had for at "Hello!"... I quote Col.Kurtz "The Horror, The Horror..."
But anyway... throwing the Cynic that i am back into the closet... it's great to be loved ..and in love ..and do stupid stuff in the name of love.... especially when u have someone special to do it for... it's just a outrageous display of how far u'd go... rather idiotic ... but the way those freaking chemicals that work in ur head make u do stupid things ... it's funny... all material goods lose their significance...if not for being and ornate expression of your deepest feelings... Yes.. Rhett Butler said it best, "Frankly my Dear I dont give a damn!!!" well maybe i do... so does Pooh.. and Hefalumps and Woozles...(good god where did that cum from)
work and lack of sleep and food .. and exhaustion.. does fucked up things to ur head... well... like all the other 24 valentine's day before this on the planet .. this one too bore no significant mark... that would make it remarkable in anyway whatsoever ...or did it???
how goes the world .... what makes the world go around ...
A> Fat Bottomed Girls...
B> Love...
for all u flaming fags out there who wish to empathize with Freddie Mercury... go ahead pick A.. as for the rest of us... yes "Love" does make the world fo round... love in all it's forms shapes colors and varieties... from u garden variety ...Kwik-E-Mart corner store love... to the more enduring Walmart love... to the designer boutique variety of love... in all it's merchandized forms ... love does make for the capitalist's bread and butter... as any Jewish Salesman would tell u abt love and sales... in the most Jerry Maguire-isque way possible "You Complete Me!!!" and us.. what abt us... well we ...we were had for at "Hello!"... I quote Col.Kurtz "The Horror, The Horror..."
But anyway... throwing the Cynic that i am back into the closet... it's great to be loved ..and in love ..and do stupid stuff in the name of love.... especially when u have someone special to do it for... it's just a outrageous display of how far u'd go... rather idiotic ... but the way those freaking chemicals that work in ur head make u do stupid things ... it's funny... all material goods lose their significance...if not for being and ornate expression of your deepest feelings... Yes.. Rhett Butler said it best, "Frankly my Dear I dont give a damn!!!" well maybe i do... so does Pooh.. and Hefalumps and Woozles...(good god where did that cum from)
work and lack of sleep and food .. and exhaustion.. does fucked up things to ur head... well... like all the other 24 valentine's day before this on the planet .. this one too bore no significant mark... that would make it remarkable in anyway whatsoever ...or did it???
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Abre los ojos
Yes .. another day at work completed... waking up at 4:30 in the morning ... and working your fucking arse off building PLCs the size of mountains .... I mean it's moronic ... fuck you dont use your head to do anything.. it's just being dextrous and diligent from the beginning to the end .. where the only thing that matters is 1 64th of an inch precision in mounting equipment on to boards and stuff... Well there's one thing i've learnt ...this wont be something i want to do as a living ... fuck no... factory line work is no fun .. and is the sweat and blood of these men ...that has built the west.... years and years of blood and sweat ...and then squeezing taxes out of their hard earned pay checks ... is what has made the west what it is today... I tried the Michael Douglus "lunch is for wimps" on the first day.. then i fucking learnt ....the hard way ofcourse... that keeping up requires energy... and shit loads of it... man i'd be devastated if had to do this support a family... i'd break down and die... any sane thinknig individual shouldn't engage in slave labor... no matter how big the corp... and yeah ... i'm bitching and ranting alright... but it's good .. i've learnt my lesson ... and the good thing abt it being my dexterity and my clumsy fingers get a break...
Monday, February 07, 2005
Hey Jude...
Paul McCartney kinda revived yesterday night .. it was the least he could do.. considering most of us would want to see a wardrobe malfunction on his part... Would we now????
Any way if you belive in the concept that each of our lives have a soud track ...well "Hey Jude!" just became a part of mine ... the superbowl version was grand ..and splendid... but lil did i realize the next day at work i would have a Srilankan/Tamilian collegue named "Jude" (Figure that Avi!!!) ...
Well the guy was cool ... and he showed me around the placed and is my mentor ... I had a good long 9 hour shift with him... showed the brilliance ... and utter stupidity that "the Arun" can accomplish in the span of a day...
It seems i should be able to handle it ...it's mundane ... it's boring ... after all that's why they call it WORK!!! ... Well cya later ... readers ... that's all for now ... do be considerate enough to leave a stray comment .... it would do my ego a world of good!!!
Any way if you belive in the concept that each of our lives have a soud track ...well "Hey Jude!" just became a part of mine ... the superbowl version was grand ..and splendid... but lil did i realize the next day at work i would have a Srilankan/Tamilian collegue named "Jude" (Figure that Avi!!!) ...
Well the guy was cool ... and he showed me around the placed and is my mentor ... I had a good long 9 hour shift with him... showed the brilliance ... and utter stupidity that "the Arun" can accomplish in the span of a day...
It seems i should be able to handle it ...it's mundane ... it's boring ... after all that's why they call it WORK!!! ... Well cya later ... readers ... that's all for now ... do be considerate enough to leave a stray comment .... it would do my ego a world of good!!!
Thursday, February 03, 2005
I'm on the verge of the next step...
It's been a rather eventful busy week... with the usual KPI stuff and a whole load of meandering thru the miscellanious kinda thing ... nothing major just small little things ... and that's abt it ... hummm ... what more do i have to punch in .... i had a cpl of ideas the last time i had thought abt writing something ..but it got lost in transit... Oh well ... another day another time ... i'll see what happens..
As for now just a craving to scroll down something ..but nothing substanial... so lemme get along with what ever i was doing instead of thinking of ten different things at the same time..
As for now just a craving to scroll down something ..but nothing substanial... so lemme get along with what ever i was doing instead of thinking of ten different things at the same time..
Friday, January 28, 2005
In Good Company
YES... the movie was for every KIDult ..for every ADULT-escent out there... It was my movie... I liked it ...No i enjoyed it... Why coz i had this conversation with elke earlier in the day .. and we were talking abt this certain thing that we were talking abt ... my predicament ... or let's say this certain juxtaposition that i'm in ... it was as though the silver screen was playing it out to me... like i told her... the yr has engaged in some kinda re-wiring my inner circuitry ... where by im turning into this sap ... this uber-romantic of some kind... It's probably got something to with being on the planet for almost a quarter century now... well let's just say there's this agenda i've .. the Tony Montana philosophy of life has three stages... "In this country, first jou get the money, then jou get the power, then jou get the women."
In my lil domain .. in my narrow scope of reality .. the slice of life that i have gotta deal with ... well i'm working on it ... i've got pseudo-power ..that's power in terms of a title.. with no monetary kick backs.. but to get the positive aspect outta it let's just for arguement's sake say i've conquered the power domain ... and now it's the other two domain's that are left... money is over-rated.. in terms of monetary value pieces of ppr shouldn't dictate our lives... but it's the purchasing power of those pieces of ppr that dictate the course of our lives.. the direction ..the pursuit to those desires .. humm... vanity does play a part ... but none the less... it's when money is spent on the ones that we love that it turns into a beautiful thing... (i told u i'm romantizing even money).... well... yeah.. any way money... will come ..or it 'll go .. it isnt substanial how much we make or much we need... it's abt the good times at the end of it all.. that's what we live for ... and i'm pretty sure i've got it in me to take it all the way... now that leave's the final frontier... ok .... this is an open confession ... i think... or let me say i suppose i think i've an idea ...for somebody i want to spend the rest of my life with... have i asked this person ... NO!!! do i intend to tell this person any time soon ... NO!!! am i romancing this dream a lot ... YES!!! will it work out ..maybe... when do i intend all my loved ones to know abt it... 5 yrs from now... that's right FIVE years from now!! that's right... all decisions come 5 yrs from now... but there has to be some kind of pro-active participation in the involvement of a cpl or something of the sort .. i do agree... but i'm not ready... it's just a euphoric idea.. a concept that i'll be incubating till the time is right.... when will it be right.. I dont know... kinda silly.. aint I? yeah ..silly is what silly does... well any way ... like i said .. i'm this kidult.. who's not sure .. who's not yet ready... if relativity were a reality ... i could have engaged in a more pro-active approach... but it isnt.. and i carry on... will i tell any one ... any time soon.. i dont know... well i love it the way it is as of now... Amen..
In my lil domain .. in my narrow scope of reality .. the slice of life that i have gotta deal with ... well i'm working on it ... i've got pseudo-power ..that's power in terms of a title.. with no monetary kick backs.. but to get the positive aspect outta it let's just for arguement's sake say i've conquered the power domain ... and now it's the other two domain's that are left... money is over-rated.. in terms of monetary value pieces of ppr shouldn't dictate our lives... but it's the purchasing power of those pieces of ppr that dictate the course of our lives.. the direction ..the pursuit to those desires .. humm... vanity does play a part ... but none the less... it's when money is spent on the ones that we love that it turns into a beautiful thing... (i told u i'm romantizing even money).... well... yeah.. any way money... will come ..or it 'll go .. it isnt substanial how much we make or much we need... it's abt the good times at the end of it all.. that's what we live for ... and i'm pretty sure i've got it in me to take it all the way... now that leave's the final frontier... ok .... this is an open confession ... i think... or let me say i suppose i think i've an idea ...for somebody i want to spend the rest of my life with... have i asked this person ... NO!!! do i intend to tell this person any time soon ... NO!!! am i romancing this dream a lot ... YES!!! will it work out ..maybe... when do i intend all my loved ones to know abt it... 5 yrs from now... that's right FIVE years from now!! that's right... all decisions come 5 yrs from now... but there has to be some kind of pro-active participation in the involvement of a cpl or something of the sort .. i do agree... but i'm not ready... it's just a euphoric idea.. a concept that i'll be incubating till the time is right.... when will it be right.. I dont know... kinda silly.. aint I? yeah ..silly is what silly does... well any way ... like i said .. i'm this kidult.. who's not sure .. who's not yet ready... if relativity were a reality ... i could have engaged in a more pro-active approach... but it isnt.. and i carry on... will i tell any one ... any time soon.. i dont know... well i love it the way it is as of now... Amen..
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Oscar '05
My Oscar predictions ..or who i'd like to see win ..
Best Director: Martin Scorsese
This man has made quite a few good movies in his haydays...Goodfellas, Taxi Driver, i say it's high time he get's his due...
Best Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett
This woman has given us stalwart performances ... and among the lot she deserves it the most (she deserves 2 oscars come to think they gave one away to Haley Berry for Monster's Ball .. ohmygod.. that was a porn flick for crying out loud... all that female every did was cry and fuck...)
Best Supporting Actor: Morgan Freeman
As much as i want to see Jamie Foxx win, this guy deserves it ... Have u seen him in Shawkshank Redemption, Driving Miss Daisy, fuck he lost to Sean Connery the last time he was nominated in this category... i hope he wins this time
Best Actress: Annette Bening
She lost to Hillary Swank last time round... i think she's got a better chance this time round... and let's see how they vote this time ..tides might be in her favor...
Best Actor
this is a tough one ... as much as i loved Jamie Foxx in Ray ... i dont think they'll give it to him .... Sidney Poiter, Denzel Washington... Humm is it time for the academy to pick another black actor as the best i dont know ... the prejudices are not in his favor... Johnny Depp... this is his second nomination in a row ... and has he given outstanding performances tine and again... yes he has ... fuck he might just walk away with it this time... Leonardo Di Caprio ... the second biographical contender in the race... my .. he looks much better off this time ... better than his chances from the Gilbert Grape days... Clint Eastwood... he's 70 freaking 4 ..the man's come up to tell us ..GO AHEAD ..MAKE MY DAY!!! will the academy sway his way.. there's a good chance...
so my predictions for winning the esteemed title would be Eastwood, Depp, Dicaprio and Foxx in that order...
Best Director: Martin Scorsese
This man has made quite a few good movies in his haydays...Goodfellas, Taxi Driver, i say it's high time he get's his due...
Best Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett
This woman has given us stalwart performances ... and among the lot she deserves it the most (she deserves 2 oscars come to think they gave one away to Haley Berry for Monster's Ball .. ohmygod.. that was a porn flick for crying out loud... all that female every did was cry and fuck...)
Best Supporting Actor: Morgan Freeman
As much as i want to see Jamie Foxx win, this guy deserves it ... Have u seen him in Shawkshank Redemption, Driving Miss Daisy, fuck he lost to Sean Connery the last time he was nominated in this category... i hope he wins this time
Best Actress: Annette Bening
She lost to Hillary Swank last time round... i think she's got a better chance this time round... and let's see how they vote this time ..tides might be in her favor...
Best Actor
this is a tough one ... as much as i loved Jamie Foxx in Ray ... i dont think they'll give it to him .... Sidney Poiter, Denzel Washington... Humm is it time for the academy to pick another black actor as the best i dont know ... the prejudices are not in his favor... Johnny Depp... this is his second nomination in a row ... and has he given outstanding performances tine and again... yes he has ... fuck he might just walk away with it this time... Leonardo Di Caprio ... the second biographical contender in the race... my .. he looks much better off this time ... better than his chances from the Gilbert Grape days... Clint Eastwood... he's 70 freaking 4 ..the man's come up to tell us ..GO AHEAD ..MAKE MY DAY!!! will the academy sway his way.. there's a good chance...
so my predictions for winning the esteemed title would be Eastwood, Depp, Dicaprio and Foxx in that order...
Monday, January 24, 2005
Collingwood Times...
Spent the weekend away on a ski resort ... Collingwood... like i said ealrier .. amazing place.. i've been to desert resorts.. beach resorts ... but lemme tell u this u've to have been at a ski resort to know what it's like ... It's a totally outta this world experience... Hell yeah... It was pretty nasty out there in terms of weather... -24C thru the course of the night sometimes a lil bit more with the wind chilll... but that's not too bad considering that Hamilton was hit bya snow storm and was blanketted by 3ft of snow... so there you have it ... i escaped the freaking white shit storm again... As for what i did there... i drunk my self stupid .. and then regained consciousness and then spent the next day smoking my self stupid... It was divine ... I pulled this chick from western university across the other chalet ... (a slip of the hand and she's a good two storeys away from the ground...) but hey i'm drunk and i give her a puff of my joint ... and away she comes... and then she sez it's her birthday and Anthony pops her beer... well .. she didnt stay for long until she left and we proceeded to their place.. well lets just say things got a bit blurry from their own .. i was stoned off my ass.... had loads of fun though... played a cpl of drinking games... and then hit the sack ...It was good...
today made my first pasta ever ... 'Food and Wine Digest' calls it a new frontier in Pasta... the Chicago Tribune says ..it goes where no pasta sauce has gone before.. The New Yorker calls it an orgasm in your mouth...[howz that for wishful thinkning]
today made my first pasta ever ... 'Food and Wine Digest' calls it a new frontier in Pasta... the Chicago Tribune says ..it goes where no pasta sauce has gone before.. The New Yorker calls it an orgasm in your mouth...[howz that for wishful thinkning]
Friday, January 21, 2005
Tyrolean Village
So I'm off to Tyrolean Village... As I hear of it...it's a ski resort on the base of Blue Mountain @ Collingwood. I'll be there over the course of the weekend...with all the MSA brigade ... We'll upto our usual round of "bored meetings"...and probably some snow boarding/skiing and a trekking session ...or a nature walk or something like that...
What's the weather like you ask... today Friday is Sunny at a High of -18°C. later tonight we'll have some snow and a Low of -24°C. The weekend will bestow upon us blowing snow at a Low of -24°C and High of -10°C... Brrr!!!!
As for the happenings of the week.... Avi has got his visa stamped.. Holy Fuck!!! Hallelujah... i gave him a call as soon as i heard... i was uber-thrilled...
Well.. that's it for now ... will punch in more details later.. have been seeing pretty weird dreams lately... now if they are re-occuring i'll punch it out...
What's the weather like you ask... today Friday is Sunny at a High of -18°C. later tonight we'll have some snow and a Low of -24°C. The weekend will bestow upon us blowing snow at a Low of -24°C and High of -10°C... Brrr!!!!
As for the happenings of the week.... Avi has got his visa stamped.. Holy Fuck!!! Hallelujah... i gave him a call as soon as i heard... i was uber-thrilled...
Well.. that's it for now ... will punch in more details later.. have been seeing pretty weird dreams lately... now if they are re-occuring i'll punch it out...
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
K-OS
Yesterday night .... attended the k-os concert.. it was cool... great performance... awesome vibe .. loads of energy ..and it was a very vibrant world music with loads of blends kinda performance .....there was a lotta good energy ...
Ended up realizing something ... i'm turning into some uber-romantic of some kind... everything has freaking romantic overtones to it ..it's hilarious... freaking hilarious ... the inner softie is running the place... everything is u know kinda all abt the love and the peace .. and the harmony and shit... it's freaking awesome when ur high... but otherwise i hope somebody doesnt get a whiff of the inner moron running the place and catch me off guard... must be something to do with what shakesphere said abt the seven ages thing... if it's a passing stage ...i'm up to it .. otherwise ....urghh.... now that's a scary thought..
and i think i've broken my math-tutor jinx... Kathy came up to me yesterday .. and said she passed math... and not just border line but with a pretty good score... and said a big thank you and shit ... well... glad to hear that...maybe the blonde-math jinxed my jinx.. and was some kinda uber fuck up ..well any way it was a good feeling..
got a certifed graphologist to have a look at my handwriting .. and he told me some pretty neat stuff... some of it were bang on ....
as for today... Happy Birthday Chacha!!!
Ended up realizing something ... i'm turning into some uber-romantic of some kind... everything has freaking romantic overtones to it ..it's hilarious... freaking hilarious ... the inner softie is running the place... everything is u know kinda all abt the love and the peace .. and the harmony and shit... it's freaking awesome when ur high... but otherwise i hope somebody doesnt get a whiff of the inner moron running the place and catch me off guard... must be something to do with what shakesphere said abt the seven ages thing... if it's a passing stage ...i'm up to it .. otherwise ....urghh.... now that's a scary thought..
and i think i've broken my math-tutor jinx... Kathy came up to me yesterday .. and said she passed math... and not just border line but with a pretty good score... and said a big thank you and shit ... well... glad to hear that...maybe the blonde-math jinxed my jinx.. and was some kinda uber fuck up ..well any way it was a good feeling..
got a certifed graphologist to have a look at my handwriting .. and he told me some pretty neat stuff... some of it were bang on ....
as for today... Happy Birthday Chacha!!!
Monday, January 17, 2005
SiLK BOxERS
I feel great today.. Why because i feel i have been able to contribute to a better human life.. how well..let's look at it this way... you look back at your life and see your self in this particular period of time and see and feel or wished how perhaps things could have been better .. if only someone was there to look out for you.. someone was there to watch out for you .. i mean we've all at some point of time wanted it .. atleast i have.. since i've this unending need/desire/thirst that i cannot quench to empathise with ppl ..put myself in their shoes ... i guess it's my working strategy... put urself in the other persons shoes kinda thing.. see what they'd want ..they'd like done..any way to quit the rambling and to get specific...
Today January the 17th, 2005... happens to be Tina's birthday... she turns 17... WoW!!! a millennium ago i used to be 17... and in some odd way she reminds me of me... away from home ... in the middle of no where in a totally new place... with absolute strangers around you... with none of the comforts of home ...and further more unlike any of the other 16 birthdays you've had on the planet ..this one will be for the very first time that u are away from everything that was familiar to u.... kinda strangely odd... for the fragile mind of a 17 ... how did i feel abt it... i was for one not happiest ppl on my 17th... i was bitching and whining and complaining and oh jesus all that rage ...must have been the testostreone going bonkers... well... as i look at it... if there was any way i could make this kid's b'day any better than the one i had eons ago... being in the very same shoes she was in ... i had a handle of things .. but since it's me things have to have that extra bit of shall we say life's way of saying lemme see u get past that......the geographical disposition was going to be a setback ....
so thanks to that wonderful invention - the digital dog leash aka the MOBILE...i got in touch with a friend of mine... another acquaintance from when i was in those late teens ... we did a lil bit of growing up together shall we say... and i might add learnt quite a few life lessons from each other... saw some real nasty shit.. went thru stuff that moulded us into who we are today ... it must have the intensity of human emotions we shared together that a single cellphone conversation got him to set aside time for lil ol'me off his busy schedule...
and how does this grand plan of mine come to life.. i ask Deepak ... to go in search of the perfect gift ... well ... since i had this vague kinda idea that she might appreciate a CD ... being an Eminem fan in her haydays.. i honestly didnt know her present musical disposition as of today but only went with a gut feeling she might appreciate the idea behind it ...
why am i punching this all down.. i guess .. i'm putting some vanquished souls to rest...it's not demons .. it's this 17 yr old in me that needs to be heard ... that needs to live again..that needs to come to terms with life ...to be able to bring to rest that 17 yr old.. and move on ... that's what it's all abt.. and since it's a self less act that in all intentions is intended to mean more to her than it does to me .. it will in turn mean more to me...
well back to the actual happenings ... i sent deepak on an errand to get T a gift ..which i hear he was able to get her in time... and he tells me... talking to her reminded him of me.... see it's all abt that teenager we once were....and how we first met...uncanny as it may seem... and i guess being around em ...kinda sends u reliving it ..and puts that zest back in life... but the second time around ..u have that know-how of the boo-boos that happen the first time round.. so now the predicament is all abt do u wanna be a spoil sport and give em the parental NO! or the enjoy life u live it just once... right now i'm trying to be on both the boats.. it's a nehruvian dream of the mixed economy thing...the best of both worlds.. but we all know what happens is the kinda the opposite.. let's not side track here...
the point of the matter is... i'm offically calling `05 the year of love...the giving kind... i wanna be around ..in spirit in person .. a phone call ... an email... i have a lotta inner wounds that need healing... and i guess true human interaction with the ppl u love might be the only way to heal em... once again ...thank you life for giving me another chance...thank you friends for showing me what it means to be around.... thank you from the bottom of my heart....
the inner peace n tranquility i feel.... to put into persepective... you might just metamorphasize in to matter... Imagine ... every man on the planet wearing Silk Boxers.... that's how divine it feels.....the pure symphony of SILK BOxERS!!!
Today January the 17th, 2005... happens to be Tina's birthday... she turns 17... WoW!!! a millennium ago i used to be 17... and in some odd way she reminds me of me... away from home ... in the middle of no where in a totally new place... with absolute strangers around you... with none of the comforts of home ...and further more unlike any of the other 16 birthdays you've had on the planet ..this one will be for the very first time that u are away from everything that was familiar to u.... kinda strangely odd... for the fragile mind of a 17 ... how did i feel abt it... i was for one not happiest ppl on my 17th... i was bitching and whining and complaining and oh jesus all that rage ...must have been the testostreone going bonkers... well... as i look at it... if there was any way i could make this kid's b'day any better than the one i had eons ago... being in the very same shoes she was in ... i had a handle of things .. but since it's me things have to have that extra bit of shall we say life's way of saying lemme see u get past that......the geographical disposition was going to be a setback ....
so thanks to that wonderful invention - the digital dog leash aka the MOBILE...i got in touch with a friend of mine... another acquaintance from when i was in those late teens ... we did a lil bit of growing up together shall we say... and i might add learnt quite a few life lessons from each other... saw some real nasty shit.. went thru stuff that moulded us into who we are today ... it must have the intensity of human emotions we shared together that a single cellphone conversation got him to set aside time for lil ol'me off his busy schedule...
and how does this grand plan of mine come to life.. i ask Deepak ... to go in search of the perfect gift ... well ... since i had this vague kinda idea that she might appreciate a CD ... being an Eminem fan in her haydays.. i honestly didnt know her present musical disposition as of today but only went with a gut feeling she might appreciate the idea behind it ...
why am i punching this all down.. i guess .. i'm putting some vanquished souls to rest...it's not demons .. it's this 17 yr old in me that needs to be heard ... that needs to live again..that needs to come to terms with life ...to be able to bring to rest that 17 yr old.. and move on ... that's what it's all abt.. and since it's a self less act that in all intentions is intended to mean more to her than it does to me .. it will in turn mean more to me...
well back to the actual happenings ... i sent deepak on an errand to get T a gift ..which i hear he was able to get her in time... and he tells me... talking to her reminded him of me.... see it's all abt that teenager we once were....and how we first met...uncanny as it may seem... and i guess being around em ...kinda sends u reliving it ..and puts that zest back in life... but the second time around ..u have that know-how of the boo-boos that happen the first time round.. so now the predicament is all abt do u wanna be a spoil sport and give em the parental NO! or the enjoy life u live it just once... right now i'm trying to be on both the boats.. it's a nehruvian dream of the mixed economy thing...the best of both worlds.. but we all know what happens is the kinda the opposite.. let's not side track here...
the point of the matter is... i'm offically calling `05 the year of love...the giving kind... i wanna be around ..in spirit in person .. a phone call ... an email... i have a lotta inner wounds that need healing... and i guess true human interaction with the ppl u love might be the only way to heal em... once again ...thank you life for giving me another chance...thank you friends for showing me what it means to be around.... thank you from the bottom of my heart....
the inner peace n tranquility i feel.... to put into persepective... you might just metamorphasize in to matter... Imagine ... every man on the planet wearing Silk Boxers.... that's how divine it feels.....the pure symphony of SILK BOxERS!!!
Friday, January 14, 2005
Wee.... Pee.... Lakshmikutty
Yes ladies and gentelmen there you have it .... The year has greeted me with another title... I'm MSA Wee.... Pee.... Lakshmikutty... for those of you who didn't get it... MSA VP Exec... Mohawk Student Association Vice President Executive... I got the nomination package on the 12th at 10am... came back an hour and half later... with 75 ppl that had signed off ... i had it made... but i thought i might have some one running against me ... but what do you know.. i just got thru ...
It's GOODDDDDDD!!!
It's GOODDDDDDD!!!
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
"CHIN-ju Node ChodheEe Queue"
I'm back after a much needed break ... I feel rejuvenated... I feel nourished ... I feel GOOOOOOOOOOOOD......... It's been ages since that's happened but lemme tell u this it's an awesome feeling....
Unlike how I usually land up next to a grumpy ol'fart .. this time my flight was different ... I had a decent chick sitting next to me on my flight from dammam to amsterdam ... and what was my first utterence... to her... (i must admit she was looking rather uptight...) ..I said... "For starters ... I Snore... ".. and lo and behold she bursts out laughing ... which i guess was a good sign.. any way .. stirred up a healthy conversation ... the flight were late but not horrendously so ... i had the usual array of hiccups i have at airports across the globe especially in saudi arabia... but years of trying to tame this donkey has been anything but successful for the saudis.... so here i am unscathed by the tribulations that would bring mere mortal passengers to their knees...
As for my holiday... it was by far the best one i've had in this quarter century on the planet... Yes... THE BEST holiday yet.. It came at a time when i needed it the most .. IT had all the ppl i needed to see and be with the most ... we did all the things that holidayers should do ...and it was my little trip to an utopia we created ... we nourished and bade our farewells to .. and i guess each of us will treasure in his or her minds in his or her ways the exact recreation of it all ...as for what was this perfect holiday like ... that is a question for which u'll have to: "CHIN-ju Node ChodheEe Queue"
Unlike how I usually land up next to a grumpy ol'fart .. this time my flight was different ... I had a decent chick sitting next to me on my flight from dammam to amsterdam ... and what was my first utterence... to her... (i must admit she was looking rather uptight...) ..I said... "For starters ... I Snore... ".. and lo and behold she bursts out laughing ... which i guess was a good sign.. any way .. stirred up a healthy conversation ... the flight were late but not horrendously so ... i had the usual array of hiccups i have at airports across the globe especially in saudi arabia... but years of trying to tame this donkey has been anything but successful for the saudis.... so here i am unscathed by the tribulations that would bring mere mortal passengers to their knees...
As for my holiday... it was by far the best one i've had in this quarter century on the planet... Yes... THE BEST holiday yet.. It came at a time when i needed it the most .. IT had all the ppl i needed to see and be with the most ... we did all the things that holidayers should do ...and it was my little trip to an utopia we created ... we nourished and bade our farewells to .. and i guess each of us will treasure in his or her minds in his or her ways the exact recreation of it all ...as for what was this perfect holiday like ... that is a question for which u'll have to: "CHIN-ju Node ChodheEe Queue"
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
Karma Accountant
It's great to start the year with the karmic ledgers balnced out ..and you ring in all the good karma to jump start the year... I mean it's family and friends ..they're just NOS for your karma... All the positive good energy around you ...this must be heaven... yes i must be on the 'Stairway to Heaven' ....
When dreams aspirations and the little things in life that you've hoped for just come true ... It's so uplifting ..it makes you believe.. believe..in people ... in love .. in hope... in the virtues of the human spirit... i'vent felt so good about myself... about the people around me ... about each and every single thing about life... ever... i guess.... If this is a sign of the happy times in life... I'm grateful ... For everything.. for this moment ..for all the people i've met along the way... for all the learning experiences in life i've had...
To aspire of anything of me ..of what i can and could have had eluded me ... but now ... I feel re-energized ...yes ...the vigor the vitality the spirit and zest for life ... to face life head on ... to take up every obstacle there is to come ...and what is the kryptonite you need to keep you going... All you need is to remember the sweetest cutest innocent gurgling babies around you...how they waddle around and talk in that divine baby tongue only babies can ...and how you remember how those kids you used to carry around just till yesterday are as big or bigger than you ... how those tadpole like hairless babies of yesterday ...cum up with the cutest jokes today....babies/kids ... it's just amazing how much karmic energy they possess.. the spirit of innocence... each time they call out your name ..they fill you with all that is their's and more...much more..... An epitome of love.....when they call out to you... it's just divine... to feel wanted ..how i cherish the caring the giving the currency to immortality ... Innocence... the schemes they hatch... their mickey mouse infatuations ...the chuckling laughter .... oh god...lock me up in this time warp where all that happens are these events over and over again...
I've always been the big 1..... never was i the one who could get away with a a shrill scream.... I'd always to give way to the younger ones .. in the process some where along the way the resentment and why me died ..giving way to the eternal big brother.... and for once in my life i'm so happy about it.. i'm in tears.... to ave had everyone under one roof... for these cpl of days ...days i cross my heart not to forget as long as my memory doesnt fail me......in each of their eyes i see me...saying doing something i once did .. i once said....and to be around when they want me would be nice... but i've never truly been a proactive part in their lives have i .. if there is ever a new year's resolution i'd like to take is to be a more active part of their lives ... who am i kidding.... the circle of life has eluded me from the major part of their lives so far.. will they accept me... or am i too old to be included... have they shown me the door .... or am i that weird wacko who shows up once in awhile ... and then just disappears to em....i guess i can always go back to that land of make believe in my head for solace and comfort...or if the new year is any sign of things to come ... there might be a tsunami in the channels of communication....
my life has taken quite a few detours ...but i learnt it's never a race with anyone but yourself... and i've battled a lot of my inner demons ..exorcized those fears that kept haunting me ... it's a matter of conviction i guess... and it's taken quarter of a century....for me to get somewhere in the vicinity of ..or so i think...
Let me come to a close ....with words from Luhrmann:
"Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. "
When dreams aspirations and the little things in life that you've hoped for just come true ... It's so uplifting ..it makes you believe.. believe..in people ... in love .. in hope... in the virtues of the human spirit... i'vent felt so good about myself... about the people around me ... about each and every single thing about life... ever... i guess.... If this is a sign of the happy times in life... I'm grateful ... For everything.. for this moment ..for all the people i've met along the way... for all the learning experiences in life i've had...
To aspire of anything of me ..of what i can and could have had eluded me ... but now ... I feel re-energized ...yes ...the vigor the vitality the spirit and zest for life ... to face life head on ... to take up every obstacle there is to come ...and what is the kryptonite you need to keep you going... All you need is to remember the sweetest cutest innocent gurgling babies around you...how they waddle around and talk in that divine baby tongue only babies can ...and how you remember how those kids you used to carry around just till yesterday are as big or bigger than you ... how those tadpole like hairless babies of yesterday ...cum up with the cutest jokes today....babies/kids ... it's just amazing how much karmic energy they possess.. the spirit of innocence... each time they call out your name ..they fill you with all that is their's and more...much more..... An epitome of love.....when they call out to you... it's just divine... to feel wanted ..how i cherish the caring the giving the currency to immortality ... Innocence... the schemes they hatch... their mickey mouse infatuations ...the chuckling laughter .... oh god...lock me up in this time warp where all that happens are these events over and over again...
I've always been the big 1..... never was i the one who could get away with a a shrill scream.... I'd always to give way to the younger ones .. in the process some where along the way the resentment and why me died ..giving way to the eternal big brother.... and for once in my life i'm so happy about it.. i'm in tears.... to ave had everyone under one roof... for these cpl of days ...days i cross my heart not to forget as long as my memory doesnt fail me......in each of their eyes i see me...saying doing something i once did .. i once said....and to be around when they want me would be nice... but i've never truly been a proactive part in their lives have i .. if there is ever a new year's resolution i'd like to take is to be a more active part of their lives ... who am i kidding.... the circle of life has eluded me from the major part of their lives so far.. will they accept me... or am i too old to be included... have they shown me the door .... or am i that weird wacko who shows up once in awhile ... and then just disappears to em....i guess i can always go back to that land of make believe in my head for solace and comfort...or if the new year is any sign of things to come ... there might be a tsunami in the channels of communication....
my life has taken quite a few detours ...but i learnt it's never a race with anyone but yourself... and i've battled a lot of my inner demons ..exorcized those fears that kept haunting me ... it's a matter of conviction i guess... and it's taken quarter of a century....for me to get somewhere in the vicinity of ..or so i think...
Let me come to a close ....with words from Luhrmann:
"Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. "
Saturday, January 01, 2005
I Love You
I truly believe ...I belong to a community of people that comprise the greatest group of buddies that exist on the planet ... and if there was ever an exercise to prove the fact of well we get along .. how much we bond .. of much we enjoy each others company of how truly we share amoungst ourselves the enduring aspect of what as grown way beyond the confines of friendship ... it was the night of revelery we had celebrating christmas eve/new years... It is in the proximity of the heart soul and sweat.... that one experiences the true joys of life...
I could clutter sentences with adjectives of the highest denomination in trying to express what would not even come close to the shallow end of how much fun we had together... it's times like that the true meaning of the of the power of the human spirit is witnessed.... Together we have championed every human emotion ... And that makes me feel good .. It makes me innately happy... I feel elated ..so very in fact .. it is an almost divine experience...
I thank the cosmos to have let it occur... I thank every one for being there... I am deeply indebted to my folks friends and family for everything that has happened and is due to happen...
thank you .. Thank You.. Thank You.....
I love you ......
I could clutter sentences with adjectives of the highest denomination in trying to express what would not even come close to the shallow end of how much fun we had together... it's times like that the true meaning of the of the power of the human spirit is witnessed.... Together we have championed every human emotion ... And that makes me feel good .. It makes me innately happy... I feel elated ..so very in fact .. it is an almost divine experience...
I thank the cosmos to have let it occur... I thank every one for being there... I am deeply indebted to my folks friends and family for everything that has happened and is due to happen...
thank you .. Thank You.. Thank You.....
I love you ......
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